‘Performative males’ love to flaunt these books; now, only if they read them

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If male peacocks wave around their brightly colored feathers to find a mate, the internet says that the “Performative Male” is likely drinking a matcha latte while clutching an artsy canvas tote bag under his arm, listening to Clairo through wired earphones, and is probably holding up a Joan Didion book to his nose. He may look relatable, down to earth, and concerned about social issues, but the internet warns that this is all just for show. He is but a man with green-dyed red flags lurking on Bumble and Tinder, or even a local bookstore.

The rise of the performative male is one of the internet’s latest obsessions. The archetype has supposedly become so commonplace in the dating scene that a) a name has been bestowed upon them, and b) people actually started dressing up like them ironically in costume contests where men try to “outperform” each other.

The whole phenomenon has become an interesting and satirical display of what these men might think others find attractive these days. Online discourse has been hilarious to read – some coming to the defense of performative men, others breaking down what “performative” really means, and many just making fun of the situation.

But here’s the irony: the books they brandish aren’t just props – they’re essential reads with ideas that could actually make us better people if we took them seriously. These books are actually good reads and can provide you with different perspectives on some really pressing issues. 

So what exactly have they been “reading”? I haven’t read all these books myself, but I plan on embarking on a deeper journey of self-realization by spending time with these books. I hope you’ll join me on this one. This isn’t a complete list, but here’s what we spotted on TikTok:

• Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen
  A classic read that teaches about the value of family and respect, and the dangers of pride and, well, prejudice. I personally haven’t read this, but reviews say it’s a must-read to understand healthy relationship dynamics and the kinds of pressures that come with womanhood.
• Sapiens: A Brief History of Humankind by Yuval Noah Harari
  I loved reading this book because it establishes so much context as to how the world as we know it came to be. It touches on biological and social evolutionary milestones, history, religion, and so much more. If you need to understand the world better, you need to add this to your reading list.
• Play It As It Lays by Joan Didion
  The internet says that Joan Didion’s writing is unique, and each of her books leaves you feeling something. The novel asks how one goes on living when life offers no meaning, when the “game” is rigged, among other themes.
• Descent of Man by Grayson Perry
  Want to impress the females? Read a book about unpacking masculinity and how it affects relationships, power structures, and life in general. Seriously, though, this is a must-read if you want to understand how loosening the grip of rigid masculinity will benefit everyone, including men themselves – at least that’s what reviews on Goodreads say, because I haven’t read this one yet.

Performative male books…but make them Filipino?

There are still a ton of other books that we spotted on TikTok, but the overarching theme here is that performative males like to seem worldly and intellectual. Then it got me thinking, if hypothetically speaking, some performative males harped on their Filipino identity, what would they pretend to and actually should read?

I must admit, I’m not a wide reader of Filipino literature. So to help me, I asked one of my colleagues, Jodesz Gavilan, for books she can recommend.

This is what’s on her list:

• Dekada ’70 by Lualhati Bautista
  The book is not just a novel but a piece of Philippine history too. It humanizes the experiences of those who lived during martial law under the Marcos dictatorship. The performative male may not care a lot about history, democracy, and people power, but here’s to hoping they pick up this book and actually start reading it.
• Women Enough and Other Essays by Carmen Guerrero Nakpil
  As one of the country’s foremost female writers, Nakpil explored gender and identity at a time when few women were given that platform. According to reviews, she asserted that women were “enough” – not secondary, not supplemental – in shaping culture and history.
• Tiempo Muerto by Caroline Hau
  “Tiempo muerto” refers to the dead season in sugar plantations, when work dries up and workers face uncertainty. Hau uses this backdrop to explore how class divides and economic structures shape everyday lives.
• How to Read Now by Elaine Castillo
  Supposedly, this book will change the way you think about books and stories. Castillo is said to show that reading isn’t just for fun or empathy but also about asking questions like: Whose voices are we hearing? Whose stories are missing? She connects literature to real issues in a way that’s sharp, funny, and relatable.
• Yñiga by Glenn Diaz
  While rooted in the Philippine experience, the book also explores how Filipinos are connected to wider histories of empire, labor, and resistance. The novel moves between different times and perspectives, showing how the past continues to shape the present. It challenges you to think about how stories of colonization, migration, and struggle are told—and who gets to tell them.

At the end of the day, it doesn’t matter if someone picked up Joan Didion or Lualhati Bautista to look cool on Bumble. What matters is if they actually sit down and read. These books aren’t ornaments. They’re doorways to bigger conversations about history, identity, love, and what it means to be human. So maybe the challenge is this: instead of mocking the performative male, let’s outdo him by actually opening the pages. Because if more of us did, we’d have fewer red flags and a lot more genuine readers. – Rappler.com

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